Recent Musings:

Here's where I am right now.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

I'm sad today - sad because people have the capacity to spew such negative comments at me; sad because people who claim to love me don't believe in who I am; sad because I've never stood up for myself as much as I should with particular people; sad because my time in this chapter of my life is coming to a close and I've never made more of it; sad because I'm avoiding all my friends; sad because I don't fit into cliques; sad because things that please me seem to be bad things in others' opinions.

However, I am grateful for many other things as a well - for a job, for my dad and his willingness to help me when I ask, for a large family with lots of personalities, for making my own lunch today, for kind words from fellow employees, for enough borrowed money to cover the next year of my life as a full-time graduate student, for rainy days, for the excitement of knowing I'll soon be living in a big city (!), for my boyfriend, for my beliefs, for organization, for quiet nights, for full moons and new moons, for the opportunity to pick up my life and move away.

I guess right now I'm mixed emotionally. Technically, this point in my life is considered a transition period and from what I hear, a person is affected by lots of wacky things when going through a transition period. I'm trying to take it in stride, although mostly I'm just overwhelmed.